All My Life I Prayed For Someone Like You

She once told me that,
When you're being loved by someone you loved, that's the real meaning of hang fuk.
And I was touched deeply into my heart.
I felt the feeling of being loved by her.
I felt hang fuk.
If I don't have her, I won't have hang fuk at all.
She's the only girl for me.. For life.

All My Life

I Will Never Find Another Lover
Sweeter Than You
Sweeter Than You
And I Will Never Find Another Lover
More Precious Than You
More Precious Than You
Girl You Are..
Close To Me You're Like My Mother,
Close To Me You're Like My Father,
Close To Me You're Like My Sister,
Close To Me You're Like My Brother
And You Are The Only One My Everything
And For You This Song I Sing....

All My Life
I Prayed For Someone Like You
And I Thank God
That I..That I Finally Found You
All My Life
I Prayed For Someone Like You
And I Hope That You Feel The Same Way Too
Yes, I Pray That You Do Love Me Too

I'd Send You All That I'm Thinking Of........Baby

Said I Promise To Never Fall In Love With A Stranger
You're All I'm Thinking Of
I Praise The Lord Above
For Sending Me Your Love
I Cherish Every Hug
I Really Love You

All My Life
I Prayed For Someone Like You
And I Thank God
That I...That I Finally Found You
All My Life
I Prayed For Someone Like You
And I Hope That You Feel The Same Way Too
Yes, I Pray That You Do Love Me Too

You're All That I Ever Know,
When You Smile All My Face Always Seems To Glow,
You Turned My Life Around,
You Picked Me Up When I Was Down,
You're All That I've Ever Known,
When You Smile My Face Glows
You Picked Me Up When I Was Down
Say...You're All That I've Ever Known
When You Smile My Face Glows
You Picked Me Up When I Was Down
And I Hope That You
Feel The Same Way Too
Yes, I Pray That You Do Love Me Too

And All My Life
I Prayed For Someone Like You
And I Thank God
That I..That I Finally Found You
All My Life
I Prayed For Someone Like You
Yes, I Pray That You Do Love Me Too

And All My Life
I Prayed For Someone Like You
And I Thank God That I...That I Finally Found You.....

A Promise

Treating the person whom I loved the most in my life as only friend?
Looking into her eyes everyday pretending that she's just a friend?
Continue like nothing has ever happened between us before and talk to each other like a friend?
I can't do this at all. I can't.
I can't treat the girl that I loved so much as only a friend!
I can't!

She asked me for lunch just now, and I said "no".
There was a moment when I wanted to say "Yes" but I didn't.
This is the first time I said "no" to her.
Having breakfast and lunch with her is what I'm dying for everyday but I rejected her today.
My heart was in pain when I said that. I don't want to but I know I have to. I have to.
I wanted to eat with her so much! I wanted to spend the time with her so much! I really do. I really do, but I know I shouldn't!

Do you know each time you said thank you to me, you're stabbing my heart once?
Do you know being treat like some stranger by your loved ones felt so pain?

I think of you every seconds.
I waited for your sms everyday.
I waited for your call each day at 11 o clock.
I said good night to you every night before I goes to sleep.
I hug and kiss you every night.

Each time I heard songs that we both shared, my tears will drop, my heart will be sadden.
I will think of you so much. I wanted to reach for you. I wanted to call you.

But, I knew I shouldn't.
I had promised to leave your life alone without me anymore in it.
And I will keep that promise because I love you.

Love Fails

Each I think of her, my tears flow.
My heart felt so pain as if it was cut into two by knife.
Millions of questions that I'm unable to answer running all over my head.

I began to questioned love.
I began to lost hope in love because it has proven to me that only love will never succeed.
Each time I trusted love, it betrayed me.
Each time I let love decide my fate, it failed me.
I will never trust it again, never.

As I was typing this, I can feel that my heart is hurting to much. My tears are flowing down my cheek. She will not care about me anymore from now on.
I'm so heart broken. I'm so in pain. I can't hold it any longer. It is so hard, so hard than what I've imagined.

I am so tired.
So exhausted of this life.
I have no where to recharge my energy anymore.
Only emptiness awaits me.
Only loneliness surrounds me.

So tired.

Today is The Day

The day the we feared finally came.
Today is the day where I've lost my love.
Today is the day where I've lost her completely.

I felt so empty in my heart now.
I felt so uncertain about my life right now.
Everything felt meaningless.

I let her go today without any objection. I did not say anything to make her stay. But that doesn't mean I don't love her anymore. But because I love her even more. I let her go because this is what she wants. I don't want her to suffer anymore because of me.

Just be happy always. This is what I always want her to be. And I know she can do it even without me in her life.
Memories between me and her is all I have now. The most precious treasure in my life right now.
This memory will last in my head forever until the time ends.

Today is the day where we both walked separate ways.
There won't be "we" anymore.

No more.

Relieved

She's at Genting Highlands right now. Watching her expensive concert of Emil Chow.
I wish I could be there with her right now. Sitting by her side watching the concert with her.

She started her journey with another 5 of her colleagues this early morning. I told her to send me a short message when she reach Penang Bridge.
At 9 something, I still did not see or hear any sms came in. Felt something wrong, quickly I send her a sms asking her

"Why no sms one?"

But there's no reply as well. I thought maybe she had silent her phone and she did not hear the messages came in. I continue sleeping until 10 something. I thought by that time she could be reaching halfway to her destination already. She promised to sms me also. But I still did not get any of her sms this morning. I started to feel worried. But keep telling myself that nothing is going to happen. She just fell asleep and did not notice my smses. She will definitely reply me when almost reach her destination.

I waited and send her sms but there's still no reply at all. Time shows already 11 something. She should have already almost near Genting already. I couldn't concentrate at all. Walking all around my house.

It's already 12 but there's no news about her at all. I began to worried so much. I told myself if I still did not get her reply by 2 then I will drive up to Genting to find her.

When things almost get out of control, around 2, she finally called me. I quickly pick up the call. My heart felt relieved.

She told me she did send me all the smsed since this early morning. It was actually my phone network down and could not received her sms since yesterday night.
When I restarted my phone, I received 10 messages at once.

This whole morning was so ..

"speechless"

I felt so much better after her call. I knew she's safe and at Genting right now.

It was a big relieved.

Life at the Edge

I don't see colours in my life anymore.

All I could feel is only gray and grayish.
Everything seems so "alone"
Every path that I takes seems so "lonely"

The world doesn't smile to me anymore but maybe it's because I doesn't smile to the world anymore.
Everything that I did, everything that I achieve, no longer carries a value because there's no one for me to share it with anymore.

My feelings are not important anymore, sadness or happiness, because there will be nobody there to care about it anymore.
From now on, I will just be a person that had lost his heart, lost his love and lost his life.

Everyday will just be another day. There's nothing special, there's nothing to remember anymore. Only carries a memories that can never be mine forever until the end of time.

I have failed once and my heart cracked but I stood up again to put the pieces back.
Now I've failed again, but this time it's different. I can never stand up again because there's no more heart that is left within me.

Future seems so dull and lonely to me. It is so scary to live in that cruel future.

GOD, why I have to walk this path alone? Why do You show me the love of my life and now You want to take it back again?

I love her so much and I want to be love by her.
So much that anyone could ever imagine.

I'm Lost

What should I do?
Is leaving her is the only choice I've left?
Is there no other way?

These two days seems very long for me. These two nights was a nightmare and seems like it's lasting forever.
I could not sleep at all. When I close my eyes, I could see the day she's going to leave me. When I open my eyes, I felt lonely around me.

I missed her so much. I've been holding my phone whole day long. I wanted to call her. But I've promised her that we will take a few days break and think things over.

The feelings of missing her and not receiving her sms at all was so hard. Everything seems wrong when she's not around. I hardly could put up a smile. I'm lost without her.

This is the ring that I've put it in her finger before.
I really wish this ring could remain on her finger forever.
But it seems that it will only remain nothing more than a wish.

It's 11.35pm now, I sent her an sms just now, but there's no reply.
Tonight will be tough.